If Only In His Dreams Read online

  When Mr Bingley and his party were welcomed to the assembly, the whispers grew. The young man was attractive and wore a pleased expression. He had reddish blonde hair and a smile which was quite warm and approachable. The ladies with him, his sisters from the reports circulating, were fashionable, though it was apparent that they had a great deal of contempt for being at this gathering. The one who appeared to be older was not very tall, also had a head of reddish blonde hair, and was holding the arm of a rather rotund gentleman, which was most likely her husband; Mr Hurst was the name that had been heard to be the brother in law of Mr Bingley.

  The other lady was taller, and appeared taller still as she wore a turban with feathers on top of her head. This was an unusual sight, as none of the residents of the neighborhood had ever worn such headdress. What hair could be seen appeared to be a darker red than her brother or sister, which was unfortunate with her choice of color for her gown. The burnt orange gown was in a newer fashion than any of the local ladies wore, and was quite honestly very…different from what was normally accepted in Meryton. The daring cut of the bodice was nearly scandalous.

  Behind everyone else in this party was a young man who kept himself more as an afterthought, rather than prominently displayed. When he first looked up and scanned the room, his eyes roamed over everyone with disdain until they came to rest upon the face of Miss Elizabeth Bennet. Fortunately no one could hear him gasp, as his eyes were locked with hers. Could this young woman truly exist?

  Fitzwilliam Darcy had been staying in London the past month, awaiting his friend, Charles Bingley to take possession of the estate he was leasing. As Bingley did not have experience with running an estate, he turned to his dearest friend to assist him. Darcy, being not only his dearest friend, but, also, in possession of his own estate, was the first person he turned to for assistance.

  Darcy was two years older than Bingley, and the two had been friends for the past ten years. They met at school, and became fast friends, as each complimented the other. Where Bingley was outgoing and saw the good in everything and everyone, Darcy was shy and withdrawn, seeing the many evils of the world.

  The two men had lost their fathers when they were quite young, Darcy’s father died five years previous, while Bingley lost his nearly seven. Bingley’s mother had died when he was only two years of age, making it very difficult for him to remember her clearly. Darcy’s mother was frail, though she was still alive and was living at their family estate of Pemberley with his younger sister, Georgiana.

  Darcy’s family structure was far from Bingley’s. His uncle was the Earl of Matlock, who was staunch in his beliefs of propriety. Lord and Lady Matlock, otherwise known as Henry and Rebecca Fitzwilliam, had three sons and two daughters. Their eldest, heir to the Matlock estate and title was Matthew, who was married and had three children of his own The next eldest was Gertrude, who married and was living in Scotland on her husband’s estate with their son. Then came Richard, a colonel in his majesty’s army. Fourth in line was Eleanor, who was only twenty and unmarried. She lived mainly in London, enjoying the social life of the Ton. The baby of the Fitzwilliam family was Paul. He was still attending Oxford at the age of eighteen. His desire was medicine, and he hoped to one day have his own practice in the country.

  Lord Matlock was the only son, having two sisters, one older and one younger. The younger was Anne, who was Darcy’s mother. She had been fortunate in the marriage that had been arranged for her by her father, as Gerald Darcy was a kind man who cared for her and their children. The eldest sister, Catherine, was not as fortunate in her marriage. Catherine married Sir Lewis de Bourgh, a cruel man who had been quite demonstrative in his bitterness towards the world. After the birth of their only child, Anne, Catherine was informed by the doctors that it would not be safe for her to ever have another child. This infuriated de Bourgh and the next time the family saw Lady Catherine, she had a broken arm. Fortunately for Lady Catherine, her husband died when their daughter was only three years old. His death caused a great deal of gossip, as he was killed by a jealous lover at a brothel, while he was in a bedchamber with one of the whores.

  Also, fortunate for Lady Catherine, was the fact that there was no entailment on her husband’s estate, therefore she was able to take the reins of his estate of Rosings Park in Kent. Her daughter was set to inherit when she turned twenty eight which was in two more years.

  Catherine’s daughter, Anne, was engaged to marry Richard Fitzwilliam. He was preparing to resign from his commission in the spring for them to marry in May. Though Richard had not been Catherine’s first choice for her son in law, Darcy had made his decision quite clear that he was not interested in marrying Anne, and Anne was not interested in her somber and taciturn cousin in return. Richard had a pleasant and jovial attitude which was more appealing to Anne for a spouse. But this engagement was something that Richard’s father refused to acknowledge and had vowed to see that Anne did not marry his son.

  Arriving at the assembly, Darcy was not in the mood to associate with anyone. He had spent the day traveling to Netherfield after dealing with some difficult negotiations for a piece of property Darcy was attempting to acquire in the south. When he arrived and learned from his friend that they were to attend an assembly, Darcy was not pleased at all. The only other option though included Miss Bingley remaining at Netherfield to keep company with him, and Darcy had no intentions to spend any more time than necessary in her company. It was clear that Miss Bingley had set her cap for Darcy, as she made it quite clear that she wished to be the next Mistress of Pemberley. And Darcy had no intentions to ever make an offer for the likes of Miss Bingley, even if she were to attempt a compromise to force him.

  So Darcy found himself in a room filled with country folk whom he had never met before, at a dance which he had no desire in which to participate in. That was until he laid eyes on a young lady with dark brown hair and even darker brown eyes which sparkled with delight. “It is she” he thought. For nearly a year, Darcy had been dreaming of a young lady, a dark haired lady who had stolen his heart and soul each night. Everywhere he had gone, he looked for her, throughout London’s society and beyond, finding ladies who were slightly close in appearance, but none who could come close in the entire picture.

  He moved closer to where this young lady stood, hoping that someone would introduce her to him. His desire to know more of her, to hear her voice, to see if she matched the goddess of his dreams was soon to be granted. Bingley had been introduced to the young gentleman who was with the goddess, fortunately he learned the gentleman was her brother not her husband. Darcy waited anxiously to be introduced to the woman who had become his vision of love.

  Elizabeth was standing beside her sister and Charlotte Lucas when her brother introduced them to Charles Bingley, his sister Caroline Bingley, his sister Louisa Hurst and her husband Gilbert Hurst, and Mr Bingley’s friend, Fitzwilliam Darcy of Derbyshire. She became flustered when she noticed that Mr Darcy was watching her intensely. When Jane was asked for the first set of dances by Mr Bingley, Elizabeth was pleased to see her sister happy to accept. Having watched Mr Darcy, after he entered the assembly, Elizabeth was amazed to find him stepping forward to ask her for the honor of the first set. Finding no real reason to refuse him, Elizabeth accepted Mr Darcy’s request.

  The Netherfield party moved forward to be introduced by Sir William Lucas to others from the neighborhood. Charlotte leaned over to her friend. “Lizzy, what a great honor that you have been given. Mr Darcy has just met you and asked you for the first set. To look at him I would not have thought him fond of dancing.”

  “He has such a taciturn nature about him; I was astounded that he would ask me as well. I would have thought him more likely to only dance with the ladies of his own party and no others.” Elizabeth’s cheeks had taken a ruddy blush to them.

  “What is your impression of Miss Bingley?” Charlotte asked her friend. “I do not believe she is pleased to be here.”

  “You ar
e correct, if I am any judge of character. From her expression I would tend to believe her finding our country assembly to be far beneath her.” Elizabeth smiled. “And the color she chose to wear, forgive me for being critical, but the color is definitely not flattering for her.”

  “I found the turban and feathers to be…different. We saw one lady in Town wearing such when we visited last spring, but the woman was smaller build and the color of the turban was more flattering. I can see that Miss Bingley has red hair, so the burnt orange color clashes terribly.”

  “I could not agree with you more. Oh, Charlotte, how terrible we are to sit here clucking at the poor woman’s…as you said, different…choice of fashion.” Elizabeth began to chuckle. Charlotte leaned close to her friend and giggled behind her hand.

  More neighbors arrived and other young men began to request a set with Elizabeth and Charlotte as well as Jane, though Mr Bingley had shown a distinct preference to Jane.

  The music began, announcing that the dancers should take their places for the first set. Mr Bingley and Mr Darcy came to claim the hands of the Bennet sisters. As she walked by Miss Bingley, Elizabeth had the impression that if it were possible, the lady would have shot daggers from her eyes at Elizabeth. This was puzzling to Elizabeth, as she saw no partiality on Mr Darcy’s part towards his friend’s sister.

  Throughout the first dance of the set, not a word was spoken between Darcy and Elizabeth, but his eyes never left his watch of her. Her movement and grace were entrancing, making him wish to hold her and touch her as he had his dream goddess. The second song of the set began and Elizabeth, nervous at being watched by Mr Darcy in such a way, could take the silence no longer. “Mr Darcy, I must insist for some words to be spoken. Perhaps I can comment on the number of dancers and you could speak of the talent of the musicians.”

  A small smile graced his lips. Yes, the voice, it was the woman of his dreams. “Do you find it necessary to speak while dancing, Miss Bennet?”

  “Indeed, Mr Darcy, for otherwise it would be far too solemn if no words were exchanged. And I refuse to allow a dance to be too taciturn.”

  They separated for a moment until the dance steps brought them back together. “Very well, Miss Bennet, how do you find the assembly so far tonight?”

  “First, Mr Darcy, my sister is Miss Bennet. I am Miss Elizabeth. And secondly, I find the assembly well attended, though fewer men were able to attend due to the harvest. So, I thank you for saving me from having to sit due to a shortage of partners.”

  “I would find it difficult to believe that you would ever lack in partners, Miss Elizabeth.” Darcy reveled in being able to use her name. “Someone who is not only quite easily the most handsome young lady here, but also it appears that you are well spoken as well, would be in constant demand by my way of thinking.”

  “You flatter me, Sir. I am neither handsome nor in constant demand. My sister, on the other hand, fills that description easily.” Elizabeth turned her eyes towards her sister.

  Darcy could not take his eyes from the beauty before him. “I believe that it is you, Miss Elizabeth, who is mistaken. Your sister may be pretty, and I do agree with you on that point, but she does not hold a candle to you. I pray you do not find me inappropriate, Miss Elizabeth, but I wish to know more of you.”

  These words came just as the dance steps forced them to separate again. Elizabeth was pleased, as it gave her a moment to collect her thoughts. She could feel her skin turning a shade of brilliant red, the heat rising throughout her body. When the movement brought them together again, she could not look into his eyes.

  “Miss Elizabeth, forgive me for being forward. I have never behaved so with any other woman. I am just as shocked as you are by my behavior. But I have met many young ladies in my life and none of them have ever affected me as you have.” He spoke as they were quite close, the words coming as more of a husky whisper. Shivers ran down Elizabeth’s spine as he spoke.

  “And how have I had an effect on you, Mr Darcy?” Elizabeth whispered back.

  “That is not for me to say in such a setting, Miss Elizabeth.” Darcy found himself behaving in a manner he had despised in others of his station in society. Many men of wealth thought nothing of seducing and bedding any women they wished, marriages did not matter. If fact, most marriages of the Ton were marriages of convenience and other than producing heirs, the men, and even the ladies, were commonly known to have affairs. Darcy detested this behavior. He had been taught from an early age what it was to respect himself as well as his family. His father had been in love with his mother, and because of that love and devotion, he refused to ever stray outside their marriage. It surprised Darcy to learn from his father that he had never entered into relations with any lady before his wedding night, and that if Darcy were wise, he would save himself for the woman he would one day marry.

  But this woman, this vision which seemed to have exploded from his dreams, had stolen his ability to think properly. In his dreams, they had been a couple for what seemed to be an eternity. And they had made love many times in that world, a world that had shown him such delight and pleasure. It was difficult now to think of this as reality, not the exotic world inside his mind.

  “Forgive me, Miss Elizabeth. You have reminded me of a dream I had, one which the young lady looked and sounded just as you do. I must remember that I am no longer dreaming, but in the presence of a young lady.”

  The heat rising inside Elizabeth was making her blush deeper. Darcy noticed that her color had heightened, leading him to imagine how far the flush of color extended. ‘Stop’ he said inside his mind. ‘She is a lady, flesh and blood. I will not disrespect her.’

  Fortunately, the dance came to an end, and Darcy escorted his goddess to where her brother stood. After releasing Darcy’s arm, Elizabeth walked to where Charlotte was seated behind Alex. Darcy leaned in to speak quietly with Alex, praying for the answers he desired.

  “Forgive me, Mr Bennet, for being so direct, but I wish to speak to you of your sister, Miss Elizabeth.”

  Alex took a deep breath. Could this be the answer to his prayer? He knew that it was essential that Elizabeth and Jane both find good matches and be settled well in their own homes. This was a responsibility he took seriously. Even though Elizabeth had told him of her desire to only marry for love, Alex knew that the chance of that was rare. She would do as he told her, or Alex would have to set his foot down with his sister.

  “And what would you wish to speak to me of in regards to Elizabeth?” Alex attempted to appear every bit the guardian and gentleman that was expected to conduct business on his sister’s behalf.

  “Would you mind if we were to step from the room for a moment? With the noise in here, I would prefer to speak somewhere a little quieter.” Darcy stated.

  Motioning to Darcy to follow him, Alex moved towards the side of the room. He noticed that Elizabeth had been collected for the next dance by Samuel Long, the son of one of their neighbors.

  Chapter 3

  Stepping into one of the side rooms where men were known to gather to speak or play card games, Alex made certain that they were alone by closing the door. “You said you wished to speak in regards to my sister. Of what would you wish to speak?”

  Darcy attempted to gather his thoughts. “Is Miss Elizabeth spoken for? Is she engaged or in a courtship at this time, promised to anyone?”

  Inwardly Alex smiled. From what he had heard of Mr Darcy of Derbyshire, the man’s fortune was extensive. This could be the perfect situation for Lizzy. “No, Mr Darcy, she is not attached to anyone yet. Though, as I am certain you will agree, I doubt it will be long before there will be a great many young men wishing to claim Elizabeth’s hand. I have been concerned for several years, since the death of our parents, of finding a man who was worthy of marrying each of my sisters. I will not allow them to be treated poorly or misused.”

  “Of course you would be protective. I have a younger sister I am responsible for as well. Fortunately, my sister
is a great deal younger and is not out in society as of yet.”

  “Then I am certain that you are aware of how difficult it is to do right by a sister. Is there more you would wish to speak of in regards to Elizabeth?”

  Darcy stepped closer to the window. Looking out, he gathered his wits about him to continue. “Forgive me, Mr Bennet, but I have never dealt with such a situation before. I have long felt as if I were a prime steer or stallion, the way I have been treated by the matchmaking mammas and their young daughters. Due to my estate and my wealth, I am regarded as a spectacular catch by the Ton.”

  “Indeed, I believe I have seen your family name in the papers over the years. And is this to impress me, your wealth?”

  Smiling, Darcy turned back towards the young man before him. He was impressed that Alex was not on his knees begging for Darcy to marry his sister immediately after he had danced with Elizabeth. “Sir, I am not attempting to impress with my wealth. I am simply explaining that I have had my share of avoiding the young women of the Ton, and, yet, find myself taken by a country miss. I must begin with telling you that I have dreamed of meeting a woman just as wonderful as your sister. The young lady I dreamed of looked and sounded just like Miss Elizabeth. If I am not mistaken, your sister is well read, sometimes impertinent, as well as very intelligent and not afraid to share her opinion.”